At 22, I was finally able to get a divorce for an arranged marriage I never consented to. There is so much stigma attached to the concept of a divorced woman.
What is wrong with her? She is used goods. She's no longer a virgin. She has her own baggage. Why would anyone want a used woman when they could have a virgin in her 20s and start fresh with her.
What is wrong with her? She is used goods. She's no longer a virgin. She has her own baggage. Why would anyone want a used woman when they could have a virgin in her 20s and start fresh with her.
In the USA, there is much less stigma about divorced women but there is still a lot of judgement attached to it. I normally won't speak of my divorce. But my mother enjoys making a spectacle of me abandoning the stranger she picked out for me. It's so difficult remaining civil and smiling to women who say things like
“sweetie you're Muslim. What happened? You're married. You shouldn't behave this way.”
This fake act of caring is so infuriating. After the age of 18, it is very common for women of Southern Asian countries to marry, most of them through arranged marriage. It didn't work for me. It is not a concept that I support nor believe benefits anyone.
“sweetie you're Muslim. What happened? You're married. You shouldn't behave this way.”
This fake act of caring is so infuriating. After the age of 18, it is very common for women of Southern Asian countries to marry, most of them through arranged marriage. It didn't work for me. It is not a concept that I support nor believe benefits anyone.
Very rarely will anyone ask if you are happy in your marriage. The questions are all the same. Are you expecting? When are you expecting? Do you meet your husbands every need? No one bothers to ask about the bruise on the woman's body. Or if she chose to be a housewife.
No one bats an eye that your husband beat you relentlessly because you didn't appeal to his every whim. To me that is disgusting. People will rather accept an illusion of a happy marriage than to allow the woman to make decisions for herself. I understand this practice isn't going anywhere anytime soon. I'm a firm supporter of divorce. If you were married off at a young age, that's fine.
No one bats an eye that your husband beat you relentlessly because you didn't appeal to his every whim. To me that is disgusting. People will rather accept an illusion of a happy marriage than to allow the woman to make decisions for herself. I understand this practice isn't going anywhere anytime soon. I'm a firm supporter of divorce. If you were married off at a young age, that's fine.
You were most likely pressured into it. But if you find your voice and want to free yourself, nothing should stop you. You are responsible for your own happiness. Do not let others dictate your life. Nor stay in an abusive marriage for the sake of society. Break boundaries, even if it paints you as the black sheep. Make choices solely for yourself.
-Waheda Islam
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