It’s important not to completely ignore what others think of you.

But it’s just as important not to live your life trying to please everyone.

Society isn’t a single voice—it’s made up of countless people, each with their own opinions. No matter what you do or believe in, someone will always disagree or be upset.

There’s a powerful quote: “You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.” I completely agree with this. But I’d also like to add another thought: “You have friends? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.”

Real relationships—friendship, love, or respect—come only when you stand for something. If you always try to fit in or avoid conflict, you may never connect with people on a deeper level.

In truth, love and hate often come from the same place. The people who are most admired are often the ones who are also criticized the most.

Trying to please everyone is not only impossible—it can cost you your peace and sense of self.

What matters more is knowing how much to please other and how much to stand up for yourself. Make your choices with that in mind.

The key is to find a balance between staying true to yourself and being considerate of others. That balance is what leads to a meaningful and fulfilling life.

Here are some things to consider every time you worry about what others might think:

I believe in what I'm going to call the disappointment imperative. I am completely ready and willing to disappoint anyone who wants something for me that I don't want for myself.

People think about you less than you think. They have the audacity to be too preoccupied with themselves to be concerned about you. (I mean, sheesh.)

Why do people talk about others? Because tearing someone else down is evidence that you are unhappy with a part of your own life. The happier you are, the less you will criticize someone else, and the more empathy you will feel for what they are going through.

What someone says about you when they are unhappy with themselves is more about them than it is about you. As such, it's not ever a good guide for how to live your life. Don't make decisions based on what others might think or say. It will steer you wrong every time.

The busier you are working on you, your life and your happiness, the less time you will have to talk about others. And even better, the less time you will have to show any concern for what others say about you.

Most of all, I am a deeply flawed person. I have a lot of work to do and as such I have no time to waste.

-Dushka Zapata

If a cab driver makes more money than an IT professional, why should I study?

Let me talk about kids and young people and what can damage them the most

1. Long term emotional neglect. If you are neglected by caregivers — not touched, not treasured, not seen and barely noticed, your heart will die a little every day. You will either decide you have no value or you will do whatever it takes to get the attention you crave. Both will lead to disaster.
2. Long term emotional abuse. It sounds crazy, but this may be less damaging than complete neglect. It’s bad, but at least you are real and alive and seen. Still, like the neglected child, you may grow up to be hateful, abusive yourself, or you may seek out abusive relationships because that’s all you know.
3. Substance abuse in children and teens. This is much worse than for adults, because kids are wired to develop psychologically at a fairly rapid pace. Being stoned or drunk or high interrupts the course of development. We don’t get a second chance at childhood or adolescence, even if some of the damage can be repaired later.
4. Traumatizing experiences without adequate support. Long, serious illnesses, major accidents, and big losses like a nasty divorce, can interrupt healthy development. High conflict divorce is a double whammy because kids are hurt by parental conflict, and parents may disappear into their own issues, making matters worse.
5. Being different. Kids who feel different because they are too fat, or too slow, or too clumsy, or sexually different can really suffer. Often they get only generic pep talks that minimize their pain and sense of exclusion. In our evolution, being a member of the tribe meant survival, so kids long for it. Exclusion for long periods can be seriously damaging.

-David McPhee

I am really depressed whether to continue my MSc or start preparing for a government job as my family starts pressuring me for marriage and a job. What should I do?

Don't let your parents push you around because you are a girl. If you do that, next it will be your husband pushing you around. Tell them you want to finish your studies and then get a job of your choice. Marriage should be ruled out till you are financially independent. And you choose your own life partner - don't accept any parental bullying and don't let them force you to marry someone of their choice.

Learn to assert yourself if you want to come out of your perceived depression.

-D D Rishi Ex-IRS, PhD-Law