My wife is currently a resident physician in her second year. She frequently puts in 90+ hours a week of work (we live an hour away from her work so that adds 2 more hours away from home).
Currently she is doing something called “night float” where she works during the night and comes home during the day. She typically leaves around 6:45 PM and returns around 10:00 AM. She wakes up around 6:00 PM from sleeping and I try and catch her for a few brief minutes before she leaves again. This has been going on for a month and thankfully is almost over.
Before that she had to do a 24 hour shift once a week and all sorts of other crazy schedules. She is constantly sleep deprived, doesn’t get enough time with friends and of course, we don’t get enough time together as partners.
It is emotionally draining work. Despite being perpetually run down, you always need to be on your A-game. People’s lives depend on it. Even the smallest mistake and there is immense stress involved, not just from patients and their families but from the program and attendings.
You accrue a mountain of debt (about $250,000 in our case) and despite going after it pretty aggressively, at ~6% interest rate, it is a bear to even get through the interest each year (thankfully we refinanced this down to 4% which is helping).
We have to miss out on meetings with friends, celebrations with family, going on trips and all sorts of social engagements because it doesn’t line up with her schedule.
In a word, doctors recommend other people not to become doctors because they know how incredibly grueling, emotionally draining and painful it can be.
But, I also want to say, that some people, like my wife, were made to be doctors.
She is compassionate and empathetic even when worn down to her wick.
She is deeply intellectual, with a mind that excels at solving complex and challenging problems.
She has a grit and resilience like I have never seen before.
She loves to heal and help people.
I couldn’t be prouder of the incredible woman that she is and I am so honored to be her partner in this crazy journey of life. It isn’t easy. Actually it’s really damn hard sometimes. But in life, finding a purpose is one of the most powerful things you can do. I think 99% of people die without ever finding it. I think I am still searching. My wife, she has found hers, and that is a magical thing.
-Casey Hill
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