I’ve used a two-axis classification system for a while.
The 1–5 axis reflects the depth of your relationship.
- Level 1: You know their name and face, but don’t really interact with them.
- Level 2: You don’t really know this person on an individual level, but they’re part of your social group. You include them in events and Facebook group chats, but if they moved away, you wouldn’t really miss them. Generally, you don’t know much about them beyond shallow information (like where they work, what their main hobbies are, etc).
- Level 3: You have a 1:1 relationship with this person. You know how this person ticks, and you know large parts of their life story. You will go out of your way to hang out with them because you value them as a person.
- Level 4: This person is a semi-permanent fixture in your life. You have an individual relationship with this person, and they’ve been in your life for several years. This is the kind of person you would invite to your wedding, or call a “best friend.”
- Level 5: This is someone you would make enormous sacrifices for, like your spouse or child.
The A-C axis reflects how often you see your friend.
- Level A: You hang out or chat with them several times a week.
- Level B: You hang out with them most weekends.
- Level C: You see them sporadically, maybe once a month or once a year.
Examples
- Brian Bi is a Level 4A for me. I’ve known him for four years, and we hang out several times a week. Even when I’m not in the same city as him, he is still one of the first people I talk to when something happens in my life.
- For many people, coworkers are Level 1A or Level 2A, since you have lunch with them every day but aren’t necessarily best friends.
- People who were your best friends in high school, but who you lost touch with when you went to college in different states, might be Level 3C. You might get together with them only during school holidays, but still see them as good friends.
-Jessica Su
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